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I’ve heard mixed thoughts from parents about using living agreements with their emerging adult child living at home. Some say that living agreements feel too business-like and cold. Others report that the living agreement didn’t work. There are many that swear by using one. Most parents are willing to give it a try, but they aren’t sure how to go about forming one.

I’ve done parent workshops on this topic numerous times. I thought it’d be helpful to take my 1.5 hour-long workshop and distill it into a mini 15 minute webinar style training. I’ll explain why a living agreement is important, what areas you should consider setting boundaries around, and the five essential principles of creating a living agreement.

Key Takeaways

  • Having a living agreement makes sure everyone is on the same page and expectations are clear
  • Set boundaries around:
    • How long your emerging adult is staying at home
    • Privacy for both you and your emerging adult child
    • Quiet hours
    • Guests (e.g., who, how many, how often, what time)
    • How shared resources are handled
    • How chores and household responsibilities are split up
    • Any financial contributions
  • Follow five basic principles:
    • Be respectful during the process
    • All privileges come with responsibility
    • Pick and choose your battles
    • Have realistic expectations and consequences
    • Stick to the plan


Need more support in creating an effective living agreement? Contact Dr. Crystal I. Lee for a free 20 minute consultation to see how she can help.


Please read more about parenting an emerging adult here.